My name is Dave Resseguie, and I am the chief shepherd of The Resseguie Group. If you are like the majority of the individuals whom we work with, you are probably wondering how to pronounce my last name. It’s like “recipe” with a “g.” Recipe. Resseguie.

Before we dive into what I believe is going to be a session that brings ideas and strategies that can help you continue to grow your practices, I would love to share a story with you about very good friends of ours, Chris and Christina Martin. You can see them pictured here with their son, Gunner. [visual] Chris, the father, was a Division 1 college football player at the University of Central Florida here in Orlando, Florida. Christina was a Division 1 soccer player at the same university. After graduation, Chris got drafted by the NFL. And on his very first day of practice with the Houston Texans, another player stepped on Chris’s foot and broke it in a number of places. Ever since then, Chris has had one of those careers in the NFL where he is kind of in and out of the NFL. He makes a team; he gets cut. He gets back on a team; he gets injured, etc.

Now, I really want to tell you about their son, Gunner. Gunner was born in February 2014, and our oldest daughter, Charlotte, whom we call Charli, was born in March 2014. So ever since they were very little, Charli and Gunner have been very good friends.

Now, who you do not see pictured here is Chris and Christina’s second child, their daughter, Jada. [visual] Jada is actually right behind Gunner in Christina’s belly in this picture. You also don’t see their third child, whom they just had about a year ago and a half ago, baby Aurora.

I want to tell you about this little boy, Gunner. This little boy brought so much joy into the lives of the people he encountered. And what I would love to do is just show you a short video of Gunner and my daughter, Charli, as they are interacting one day at a little play table that we have in our kitchen area.

I had received a phone call from my wife one day to let me know that Chris and Christina had called and asked her if we could babysit Gunner for the day and that it was going to be about a 12-hour day. Christina’s parents were going to be moving into a new home, and Chris and Christina wanted to help their parents with moving the boxes and furniture and just getting all settled into their new home. So, Gunner came over, and, about midway through the day, I got a text message from my wife with this video in it.

Now, as you watch this video, all I want you to feel and think and experience is the joy that children can bring. For those of you who have children or grandchildren, or perhaps nephews or nieces, or perhaps you just happen to be around little children every once in a while, you probably know what I am talking about. So, as you watch this, just take time to experience the joy in this moment. [video]

How awesome is that? The laughter that children have is simply amazing.

You know when you make my daughter smile like that, you can have anything you want. I mean, Gunner could one day ask me for my daughter’s hand in marriage, and, because he made her smile like that, I would probably say yes. It better be a long, long time from now. It’s just amazing how much joy children can bring.

April 6, 2016, was a Wednesday.

One of the things that I love most about a career in the financial services industry — and I am sure you appreciate it also — is the autonomy that we can have and the freedom we have to create our own schedules. Gennifer and I made a decision early on in our careers that we were going to have dinner together as a family every single evening. So Wednesday, April 6, we sat down to have dinner as a family.

At our dinner table, we have the agreement that we are not going to use our cellphones. We are not going to look at emails or social media or text messages. We’re not going to take phone calls. We are simply going to be fully present and intentionally engaged with one another. Well, that night my wife’s phone was on the dining room table, and it started to vibrate. We were getting a call from her mother, my mother-in-law. And my wife’s mother is a neighbor of Chris and Christina’s. This was not specifically a very special dinner together, so I looked at Gennifer and said, “If you want to, you can go ahead and answer it.”

She answered the phone, and her mother was talking extremely quickly. She was frantic. She asked us if we knew what happened with Chris and Christina. And we said, “Slow down. We have no idea what’s going on. What are you talking about?” She said, “I think it has something to do with the baby.” This was in April, and baby Jada had just been born recently, so we said that we had no clue what happened. We hadn’t heard anything, but we would check to see if Jada was OK.

And she said, “No, no, not Jada. I think it has something to do with Gunner. There’s a firetruck at the house. There’s an ambulance. There are police cars. And the home is all taped off with yellow caution tape!”

Well, we told her that we hadn’t heard anything but to stay calm. “We will reach out to a few friends to see if they know of anything, and we will get back to you.” So I took out my phone, and I text messaged a good friend of mine, Josh. And, in our group of friends, if anyone is ever going to know with certainty what’s going on in other people’s lives, it is my friend Josh. Josh is the pastor at the church that we go to, and he always seems to know what’s going on. The challenge, though, was that on Wednesday evenings, Josh had services at the church, so I knew that I might not get a response from him until much later that evening or perhaps even the next day.

So I sent him a message, and all I said was, “What happened to Gunner?” I set my phone down on the table not expecting a response for a while. But a few minutes later my phone vibrated, and it was a reply message from Josh. I opened my phone, and all the message said was, “He didn’t make it.”

I replied back and said, “What do you mean he didn’t make it? What happened?”

Well, I came to find out that that afternoon Chris and Christina had laid Gunner down for a nap. They went into their bedroom with baby Jada to watch a movie, and about midway through the movie, they got this sort of eerie feeling, and they went into Gunner’s room to check on him. There he was in his bed, and he was fine. He was sleeping peacefully. Everything was good.

So they went back into their room, and they finished the movie. When the movie was over, they walked back to Gunner’s room to get him up from his nap. When they walked over to Gunner’s room, his door was cracked open farther than it was before. Gunner was not in his bed, so they began walking around the house calling for him: “Gunner. Gunner.” They walked into the kitchen, they walked into the living room, they walked into the dining room, and Gunner was nowhere to be found. The family room has a sliding glass door that goes out to the backyard. When they walked into the family room, the sliding glass door was open, which was not normal, and the screen door was open, and it wasn’t supposed to be open. So they walked out to their backyard.

In South Florida, it’s extremely warm, and most homes in South Florida have in-ground pools. My friend Chris walked over to the pool to see Gunner at the bottom of the pool. And they didn’t know if he had been there for 30 seconds or 3 minutes or 30 minutes — they had no clue. But in that moment, what do you do? He jumped into the pool. They called 911. They pulled Gunner out and began performing CPR to try to get him breathing. A few minutes later, the ambulance arrived, and they continued to perform CPR. They rushed Gunner to the hospital.

That day we lost Gunner.

Friends, I never called them.

I have been in this business since 2007. I have sold a number of children’s policies. I own permanent life insurance on all of my children, but I had never reached out to talk with them about their financial planning and their insurance program. So for all intents and purposes, my buddy Chris, who at that point in time was training to get back onto an NFL team, had just lost his 2-year-old son on a Wednesday. And he had to be back in the weight room that weekend trying to make a football team simply so he could provide for his family financially. And had I called them, perhaps made sure that they had a life insurance policy on their son, at least my friends would have been able to take time off to grieve appropriately. Perhaps, they would have had money available to create a legacy for their son.

Today, we are going to talk about ideas and strategies, how we can better influence our sales ratios, our ability to create favorable introductions and how to use tools like LinkedIn in order to really drive an effective new client acquisition process.

And as we go through all of that, I would love for all of us to stay focused and remind ourselves of why we are doing this in the first place.

I am here to share ideas with you today, not just to make us more effective in what we do but to share ideas with you because what we do matters, and it matters so deeply.

Now, thankfully, Chris and Christina today are doing exceptionally well. We set up a foundation to honor Gunner. Every year we still get together on his birthday and celebrate the joy in the life that he gave. We planted a tree in his honor. As good as you possibly can be doing after losing a child and grieving the loss of a child, they are doing very well.

So the theme for today is: Control 100 percent of the things that are in your control, and influence everything else.

Have you ever heard any of your mentors, or perhaps a speaker at one of your company meetings, say something like this: “This business is simple! It’s not easy; in fact, it’s hard. But this business is simple.” Do you agree with that?

Is it simple for you to pick up the phone and schedule an appointment with a qualified suspect? We’ve had a lot of successful advisors tell us they hate phoning. Is that you? We’ve also had a lot of successful advisors tell us they love phoning. Is that you?

In your opinion, what would you say the hardest part of phoning is for you? Is it getting fired up and in the zone at 8:59 a.m. before phoning hour begins? Is it the perceived weight of that phone — how often does it feel like it weighs 1,000 pounds? Is it the courage it takes to ask a stranger to meet with you? The amount of effort you need to put in? The number of dials you need to make in order to even reach one person? The fact that it seems like no one even answers their phone anymore? The rejection? The people who hang up on you?

Let’s pretend for a moment that you could create your ratios. What would an ideal reach to set ratio be for you? Are you comfortable with a 50 percent ratio as normal? Would you have any objection to being guided toward a proven way to increase your reach to set ratio from 50 percent to 75, 80, perhaps even 90 percent?

Did you know that, in an ideal world, it can actually be this high? And in our business, we create and influence our ideal world!

So let me ask you: What is the first impression a potential client currently has of you? Think about that for a moment. In your chair right now, take a self-assessment of your true answer to that question. What is the very first impression a potential client has of you?

Is it the first handshake? And perhaps those first few minutes of small talk as you greet them in a reception area? Perhaps that’s a bit better than the first handshake. Is it the first phone call that you make to them, and the feeling that they get during their conversation with you as you are asking them for an introductory, fact-finding meeting? And in that phone call, you do the following:

• You mention to them that you have a mutual friend in common who asked you to call.
• Your phoning language is well-structured, well-designed and well-articulated.
• Your responses to their questions (i.e., formerly known as objections) are worded perfectly.
• Your tone is conversational, natural.
• You are pleasantly persistent, thoroughly answering at least three of their questions.

Would you mind if I share with you, briefly, the beginning of my phoning language?

“Hi, is this Charles? Hi, Charles. This is Dave Resseguie. I’m a friend of [nominator]. How are you doing?” (They say good and ask how I am doing.) “I’m doing great, thanks. Am I catching you in the middle of anything pressing?” (And they say, “No, I have a minute.”) “By any chance did [nominator] mention to you that he’d asked me to reach out?”

Let’s time out for a second. Did you catch that: “By any chance did nominator mention to you that he’d asked me to reach out?” This is critical! This is the difference between 50 percent success in our scheduling a first appointment with this referral and scheduling 51+ percent. Our language is designed to lead the dance during our phone call. Our language/our script is our playbook! We can anticipate each response based on the specific words and sequencing we are using.

The response to that question should be some variation of this: “Yeah, actually. He shot me an email letting me know that you’d be getting in touch. He really spoke highly of you and thought we would enjoy meeting.”

OK, would you mind if I were to be so bold as to submit a philosophy here? A potential client should have three first impressions of you! The first handshake and few minutes of small talk should be their third first impression. The phone call when you ask for the fact-finder should be their second first impression. The first first impression should be when they hear in advance that you will be calling. They are told this by a raving fan of yours, and that raving fan is a highly respected nominator whose name carries a significant amount of weight with the person you have been introduced to.

So, how does this happen? You may say, “I can’t control whether someone tees me up.” Remember: Control the things that are in your control 100 percent, and influence everything else. Truth be told — and I will always tell you the truth — you can’t control whether someone tees you up, but you can influence whether they tee you up!

So what is 100 percent in our control as it relates to having a highly respected nominator who is a raving fan of ours tee us up in advance?

• We are 100 percent in control of the fact that we actually ask them to tee us up.
• We are in control of the guidance that we give them as we help them understand the experience and how people meet us.
• We are also 100 percent in control of the words that we use while we ask them to tee us up.
• Also, our ease of doing business — the fact that we can make it extremely easy for them to tee us up.
• We are in control that we actually provide them with a pre-drafted, introductory note that they can use to forward to these individuals, a note that we know they will agree with, that they will be comfortable sending and that they will make little change to.

So, as we think about it, there are really four buckets, or segments, of types of people whom we can reach out to. We could cold-call people as long as they are not on a do-not-call list. We could warm-call people. And the difference here between a cold call and a warm call is that a warm call would be someone whom you have a very strong commonality with. Perhaps it is because you went to the same university; perhaps it is because you both belong to a similar philanthropic organization or a faith-based community, or you’re involved in similar nonprofit or charitable organizations. These are people who may not know you, but if you call and mention to them that you have these commonalities, there is at least a little more likelihood that they would be open to receiving a phone call and scheduling a meeting.

Then there are qualified suspects — traditional referrals — where we have a mutual friend in common who gives us permission to mention their name when we call those individuals and mention that they spoke highly of them and thought we may find value in an introductory meeting.

The fourth segment, which, in my opinion, is the very best, is qualified suspects, but qualified suspects who are teed up by the nominator. Qualified suspects who are expecting our call because a highly respected nominator, whose name carries a significant amount of weight, reaches out to them in advance to let them know that we are going to be calling and that they think we may find value in the introductory meeting.

So, today we are going to look at a strategy using the LinkedIn tool to identify individuals who are warm connections to us, but who we can influence, making them qualified suspects — qualified suspects who are in our target market — and then even influence to move them into this fourth segment so that they are now qualified suspects who, in fact, are teed up by a highly respected nominator.

So please open up either your LinkedIn application or your LinkedIn site from the internet.

I will walk you step by step through how we can utilize the tool to identify people who are in our target market whom we can be introduced to.

As I walk you through this, what I am going to use is criteria that would be specific to me based here in Miami, so we need to create a scenario. So, let’s say that my target market is attorneys who work at one of three major law firms here in South Florida and attorneys who specifically did their undergraduate work at the University of Miami because I own a financial planning practice that specializes in working with attorneys who are alumni from the University of Miami who work at those three firms.

Open the app and click the “Search” bar.

Click “People.”

Now, what I want you to do first is to click “2nd degree” under “Connections.”

And under “Locations,” click your area of the world.

Click “Apply” and see how many results show up. You are only one introduction away to all of those individuals, and you potentially have the ability to be introduced to each of them.

Let’s go back. Click on “All filters.” Under “Industry,” type in “Law practice.” Let’s all use that as an example. And now click “Apply” again. You see it narrows down the number.

Now go back. And by default, since we selected “Law practice,” it will auto default and show you the names of specific law firms. So perhaps select two or three of those firms, and click “Apply” again.

Go back, and one more time let’s add another criterion. Select the name of a specific university or school of law.

Now, the reason we are looking only for people who are second connections of mine is because these are people whom I do not have a relationship with. But the people who are contacts who are in my network are connected with these individuals.

So now I am able to look at those I am connected to who are also connected to these attorneys. And when I look at the list of people who are mutual connections, I am now going to ask myself two questions.

The first question is, Who of my connections, who are also connected to these attorneys, are raving fans of mine? Are they truly centers of influence or advocates and allies of mine who, if ever I asked them to help our team extend the impact that we make into the community by introducing us to others whom they think highly of, would be willing and able and even excited to introduce us because they think so highly of the work that we do?

If that answer is yes, I ask myself a second question. The second question is, Of those people who are truly raving fans of mine, whose name carries significant weight where, if ever I called someone and mentioned this person’s name, and that this person spoke highly of them, would they be likely to meet with me simply because they think so highly of the nominator?

So, if both of those answers are yes, they make my list. Now, this list is specifically a research and development spreadsheet that I create where I have two columns. I use Microsoft Excel simply because I can easily sort the list. In the first column, I list the names of the potential qualified suspects, and in the second column, I list the names of the potential nominators.

Then I continue to build a very robust list of a large number of potential introductions. At the end of all that research, which may take me anywhere from 15 minutes to an hour, I sort my spreadsheet by the nominator’s name. This will group together and show me that perhaps one nominator is connected to six or seven attorneys whom I would like to have the opportunity to be favorably introduced to.

So now what do I do? How do I get introduced to these individuals? Because right now, they are still in that warm-call bucket. How do I turn them into qualified suspects?

Well, if this nominator is a raving fan of mine, I could call and schedule a dedicated prospecting meeting where we sit down over a meal or a cup of coffee, and I review with them a list of people and ask about these individuals. But if they truly are a raving fan of mine, an email to them will suffice. If you are a raving fan of someone, will you read their email? Will you reply? Of course.

So I open my email, and I sent them this message:

Subject: Do you know these people?
[NAME],
I hope this email finds you doing well.
Quick question: I was going to be reaching out to a few people I have listed below because, as you already know, I do a great amount of work with [OCCUPATION] here in [AREA]. Before I reach out to anyone, my team does a quick overview of their LinkedIn so we have a little bit more of an idea regarding their background. When I looked at their profiles, I noticed that you were connected to each of these people, so I wanted to ask you, do you know them well? If so, what would you say is special about them? Would you have any objection when I reach out to them if I mention that the two of us know each another well, and you thought that we might enjoy an introduction?
Individuals I have in my system and am planning on reaching out to: [and I list their names here]
Thanks, brother!
Dave
P.S. [Send a brief personal message here. People always read the P.S. line!]

By doing this, I have eliminated one of the greatest challenges that comes with asking for referrals, and that is asking for permission to call people. By the way, this email is structured so that I am now no longer asking for permission to reach out to these individuals; I am simply letting the nominator know that these are individuals I already have in my system and I’m planning on reaching out to. But prior to reaching out, I do the research and notice that they are connected to these individuals, so now I am just asking for background information and am curious as to the extent of their relationship.

And what is common is that nominators will reply back to emails like this, and they may say that out of the seven individuals listed, they only have a great relationship with two of the individuals. And they will give me some basic information about those individuals. And since they are a raving fan of mine, they will say that they have zero objection to me mentioning their name when I call.

So now what do I do? I have qualified suspects whom I have at least a 50 percent chance of scheduling a meeting with. But how do I move them over to that fourth bucket where they are teed up by the nominator?

I send them a second email. This is a signature email in my email system, so I am not typing this email out every single time, but this email says:

Subject: Introductory Note
[NAME],
Thanks for the feedback. I’ll be sure to mention that we know one another when I reach out.
I’m sure you can imagine, people are typically more receptive to my phone call when they know in advance that the two of us know each another well. Any chance you’d mind copying the note below and shooting it to them via email?
P.S. Feel free to scratch this and say something different or adjust the wording in any way you feel appropriate.

[NAME],
I hope all is well in your world. I thought of you today, and I wanted to introduce you and Dave Resseguie. Dave is with [COMPANY] here in [AREA]. I asked him to call you as I think the two of you would really benefit from meeting one another.
I assume that you have a number of relationships with people in the financial arena, and I am sure you have already done some financial planning. That said, Dave shared some ideas with me that I think you, as well, will find to be particularly interesting and relevant.
I’ve copied Dave on this email. Either he or someone from his team is going to be reaching out in the next few days. Clearly, there is no obligation on your part to meet. I think you would at least enjoy an introduction.
Also, I just shared his contact with you. Save it in your phone. That way you’ll know it’s him when he reaches out.
Hopefully, you get the chance to connect! Have a great day!
[NAME]
Thanks again, and have a great day!
Dave

Could you see a process like this impacting your practice?

I encourage you to send these emails three to five times per week. This could supplement an additional five to 10 introductions each week, perhaps more. Remember: Control 100 percent of the things that are in your control, and influence everything else!

David C. Resseguie began his career in the financial services industry in 2007. He spent 10 years working in leadership roles within both Northwestern Mutual and MassMutual. As chief shepherd of The Resseguie Group, Resseguie works virtually and in-person with leadership teams and financial advisors. The Resseguie Group offers one-on-one coaching, keynotes, new advisor training and leadership workshops.