Have you ever noticed that when you ramble, your subconscious encourages you to keep talking, which tortures your clients even more. Eventually, you will figure out what to say, yet, as financial professionals, you know the power behind asking open-ended questions to instantly build rapport with very few words.

What is common sense is not common practice. I think these last two years have really proved that when we had to go from in-person to virtual; everyone thought it would be easy. Instead, we created a lot of noise with the many Zoom calls. There are 300 million meeting participants on Zoom in a day, making it more difficult than ever before to communicate with influence. Influence isn’t one-dimensional — it’s sights, it’s sounds, it’s how you make people feel, and it’s how you show up. Your verbal and nonverbal communication can jeopardize your influence or enhance it without your even knowing it, which is why it’s really important to ask yourself the question, Am I really as influential as I think I am?

Influence is your body language and your messaging. They are consistent Monday to Monday. Your clients never have to guess who is going to show up. Influence means that you have this ability to move people to take action long after the interaction has occurred. We know that to grow our businesses, it’s about relationships of trust, which don’t happen in one interaction but are a series of interactions that over time are consistent.

Based on that definition, you can tell that influence Monday to Monday is going to take some focus and some work. The key to my clients’ success is momentum and repetition. This is where the influence model is going to help you.

There are three key drivers to drive this idea of influence Monday to Monday. The first is feedback. Isn’t it funny how we know feedback is critical for our development? Yet have you ever noticed how feedback is flawed? There’s not a single person in this room who hasn’t asked for feedback. Typically, we will ask, “How did I do?” And what do you often hear in response? “Great job.” It’s not even feedback. The next time someone tells you how great you are ask, “What can I say next time to give you more impact, to give you more value?” Because once you have feedback, that’s your baseline.

This ties to your second key driver, deliberate practice. In the documentary “The Last Dance,” Michael Jordan talks about how he would make 1,000 shots a day, or 6,000 a week. He went on to say that what gets rewarded in public gets practiced in private. What makes the Jordans in the world great and what keeps them great is they are constantly working on their craft. It's about getting comfortable, being uncomfortable.

Here’s the good news about growing and enhancing your influence. Every interaction is an opportunity for you to practice, which ties to that next third driver, accountability. You and I both know, it's not about what we do together in 20 minutes that is going to make you influential, it's the action you take beyond today. To help you out, I am going to give you four accountability challenges and action steps.

The best way to grow and drive your influence is for you to see yourself and to experience yourself through the eyes and ears of your clients. Now, the only way I know how to do this is through video playbacks. There’s no way we can grow our influence if we are not first self-aware. Could our body language and our messaging be sabotaging our influence? If you are not experiencing yourself through the eyes and ears of your listeners and your clients, how do you know?

One of the biggest areas of communication that we are unaware of is our lack of brevity. Lack of brevity is the biggest mistake we make that jeopardizes our influence. Start thinking and speaking in bullet point sentences. Pausing allows your clients to follow you in your message every step of the way. Comedians call it “pause for a cause.” The minute that comedians hit the punchline, what do they do? They pause because that’s the laughter. That’s the excitement. When comedians don’t honor that, they call it “stepping on their own laughter.” In our world avoid stepping on your own ideas; especially avoid stepping on your client’s thoughts. Silence sometimes is the right answer. You need to trust your competence to give yourself the chance to figure out what the right question is to build rapport so you can constantly adapt your message on the fly to meet your needs.

I want to make sure that you all have brevity, so here is your first accountability challenge. Monday to Monday, for the next seven days, ask someone in your personal life or your professional life to tell you when you ramble or whatever it is that you are willing to commit to. How many of you have someone in your personal life who can’t wait to give you feedback?

Here’s your second accountability challenge. How about for one week, you audio record yourself. When you listen to the playback, you can hear how you sound, your word choice, your messaging.

You always know what you are going to get with successful companies. They understand brand loyalty. I’m not talking about your company’s brand; I’m talking about your brand. Is your personal brand consistent or are people guessing who is going to show up? The more consistent you are, the more you eliminate doubt in your listener’s mind. Consistency equals authenticity, which builds trust for your personal brand and communicates who you are and who you are not. When we experience someone’s inconsistencies, we start questioning other areas of their life. This is not about being perfect. It’s about being conscious because when you are conscious, you can start really connecting with people on purpose and you build consistency and trust.

Let’s talk about connecting with purpose. You may be familiar with the term “eye contact.” You are ready for something so much bigger than that. I call it “eye connection.” Here’s how you do it. Only speak when you see eyes. No eyes, no talk. You can look away. In fact, I encourage you. Whether you are virtual or you are in-person, you can look away, but don’t talk when you do.

Stay connected to those who matter to you the most, which obviously are your clients. I want to make sure that you’ve got that next action. How are you connecting with purpose? Here’s your third action step for one week. You are going to ask someone in your personal life and your professional life to give you feedback when you are talking but you are not looking at them. Even if it’s quick, look away.

And here’s your big one, your fourth action step, for one week, Monday to Monday, seven days: You are going to start video recording your conversations. You can easily do it on Zoom. No one knows you are doing it when you are doing it on your phone.

Everything I just gave you comes down to one sentence: Common sense does not mean common practice.

What I am giving you is not complicated to individuals who are aware Monday to Monday. Every interaction you have determines the businesses you run, the people in your circle, the money in your pocket tomorrow and the influence that you have Monday to Monday. You are already high achievers. This is about giving you greater business success and greater influence Monday to Monday.

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